Sanford & Wife
A cloud of doom lingers over the horizon, uncharacteristically metaphorically meteorologically speaking, to the east.
If I knew any Russian swear words, I'd use 'em.
Tis the job, to be sure, but rather than leaving a separation-hardened wife and a non-walking booger-centric blob of an offspring, I now leave a uteral-occupied wife and a walking, daddy-centric little man who can almost have a conversation, if you speak his language.
I will miss the little tyke, and the good money is on the fact that he will miss me, too, and won't understand where Daddy is and make Mommy's life more of a little blazing bundle of hell than he already does from time to time.
But yesterday, on a beautiful August Saturday, we spent an hour outside alternately throwing a basketball, volleyball, tennis ball, and frisbee into his new plastic basketball hoop that Ainsley found at the end of someone's driveway last week (we're hoping they were actually intending to throw it away, but have washed all the old fingerprints off just in case), and chasing each other around the front yard and rassling in the grass.
I just stared at his red, beaming, sweaty face and thought, 'these are the times I'll miss."
He watched the first half of his first Muppet movie this evening, appropriately called "The Muppet Movie". Even Ainsley hadn't seen it, having grown up in a palace overseas where instead of watching movies she and her sister played polo and attended tea parties with emperors and shooed giraffes off her property with long, diamond-encrusted fly swatters.
I'm sorry, I'm being mean. But she was making fun of me for knowing the words to "Rainbow Connection".
The Muppets were a big deal in our household. I remember living in Germany and Dad came home from a TDY to the states telling me and my brother about a new puppet show that had just come out over there, and in a few months it aired on the one Armed Forces Network channel on our TV and it was about the best thing since sliced schnitzel.
It's really quite a clever film for adults, too, now that I watch it. Though the slow-motion rolling-in-the-fields sex-fest between Kermit and Piggy was a little off-putting. "This is rated 'G'?!"
If I knew any Russian swear words, I'd use 'em.
Tis the job, to be sure, but rather than leaving a separation-hardened wife and a non-walking booger-centric blob of an offspring, I now leave a uteral-occupied wife and a walking, daddy-centric little man who can almost have a conversation, if you speak his language.
I will miss the little tyke, and the good money is on the fact that he will miss me, too, and won't understand where Daddy is and make Mommy's life more of a little blazing bundle of hell than he already does from time to time.
But yesterday, on a beautiful August Saturday, we spent an hour outside alternately throwing a basketball, volleyball, tennis ball, and frisbee into his new plastic basketball hoop that Ainsley found at the end of someone's driveway last week (we're hoping they were actually intending to throw it away, but have washed all the old fingerprints off just in case), and chasing each other around the front yard and rassling in the grass.
I just stared at his red, beaming, sweaty face and thought, 'these are the times I'll miss."
He watched the first half of his first Muppet movie this evening, appropriately called "The Muppet Movie". Even Ainsley hadn't seen it, having grown up in a palace overseas where instead of watching movies she and her sister played polo and attended tea parties with emperors and shooed giraffes off her property with long, diamond-encrusted fly swatters.
I'm sorry, I'm being mean. But she was making fun of me for knowing the words to "Rainbow Connection".
The Muppets were a big deal in our household. I remember living in Germany and Dad came home from a TDY to the states telling me and my brother about a new puppet show that had just come out over there, and in a few months it aired on the one Armed Forces Network channel on our TV and it was about the best thing since sliced schnitzel.
It's really quite a clever film for adults, too, now that I watch it. Though the slow-motion rolling-in-the-fields sex-fest between Kermit and Piggy was a little off-putting. "This is rated 'G'?!"
posted by Dan at 8:41 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home